Alex Lyman's Haiku

Void Compiler

2009-09-02T09:10:00.000-07:00

The Void Compiler
Optimizes all my code
Into nothingness

Time

2009-06-04T06:02:00.000-07:00

Time, out of control
Don't even try to stall it
Always moves forward

Gandalf the Grey

2009-05-27T11:39:00.000-07:00

Enormous wizurd
Sez how he is mad, displeased
Invisible doom

These are hard to get to make sense, with the limited vocab.

2009-05-27T09:41:00.000-07:00

A dream together
Worship an nekkid elf girl
She ache s 4 moar lurv

A fridge magnet cat.

2009-05-27T09:37:00.000-07:00

Mah Sharp Cat Fashuns
A Harbl @ Mah Tiny Foot
I Hate Kitteh Hair

Cajun Cuisine: Nom

2009-05-17T16:14:00.001-07:00

Onion and celery,

with a bit of bell pepper:

all hail The Holy Trinity.

…---…

2009-05-04T08:23:00.001-07:00

Transmit S.O.S.

To any/all vessels nearby:

We need assistance.

We have a massive hull-breach,

and have launched lifeboats.

This gave her butterflies

2009-04-30T21:40:00.001-07:00

Soft, gentle, curly, hair
Flows down the back of her neck
As my lips kiss it

Olly olly oxen free!

2009-04-26T18:26:00.001-07:00

We play hide-and-seek:

The snow is easy to find;

The sun always wins

Yay!

2009-04-23T14:18:00.001-07:00

The bad day bright side:
There is no better reason,
to get a nice hug.

Also, they look cooler

2009-04-23T13:37:00.001-07:00

@mistahmojo:

Dreadlocks are good, but
Mohawks have more dB gain
—at least in theory

Made from string cheese and a vacuum

2009-04-23T13:16:00.001-07:00

@aurorachrisma:

A MacGyver-girl

With a makeshift pen slingshot

Aims for zombie heads

Hare Rama

2009-04-23T13:09:00.001-07:00

A cleanly shaved head

Opens the mind and the soul

Hare Krishna!

Tabs!

2009-04-19T22:20:00.001-07:00

After the Jihad

The Middle East will still fight.

Over Tabs v. Spaces

Schwazschild Wormholes

2009-04-19T21:36:00.001-07:00

Einstein-Rosen bridges
close quickly, unless held by
exotic matter

On a side note, this phenomena was posthumously named after Karl Schwazschild, even though he had been dead almost 5 years before anyone even postulated about what are now known as wormholes; and almost 20 before Einstein and Rosen found a solution for them in the Einstein field equations. That’s a damn fine publicist, right there.

Insomnia

2009-04-18T20:52:00.001-07:00

Slumber will not come
I lay there, awake for now
My dreams, free, uncaught

Just like William Kidd

2009-04-18T08:28:00.001-07:00

Somali Pirates

Attacking our cargo ships

Lets be Privateers!

Get your damn hands off my grandmother!

2009-04-17T07:09:00.001-07:00

I know what I'll do:

go back and kill my grandpa!

Screw you, paradox!

Arggghh!

2009-04-17T02:36:00.001-07:00

From my CPU,

a banshee's screech, emitted

Reboot—a problem

Where did all my files go?

"Error: drive not found"

I knew this day would come

2009-04-16T22:16:00.001-07:00

Pirates have returned.

The prophecy has come true.

Awaken the Ninja!

I hate Colorado

2009-04-16T21:47:00.001-07:00

A flash in the sky
Then comes the thunderous crack
Snow-lightning in Spring!

Squee

2009-04-16T07:49:00.001-07:00

The small of her back

My hand sits there, comfortably

It just feels right there

Why Bach hates the future

2009-04-16T07:16:00.001-07:00

Keep your hands and feet

Inside time machine at all times

Else you might slap Bach

The Singularity Cometh

2009-04-16T06:36:00.001-07:00

Diode on the fritz

Causes cascade failure:

Destroy All Humans!

I have just three words for you

2009-04-16T05:31:00.003-07:00

Pontification

Homosexuality

Humiliation

Voodoo will be the end of us all

2009-04-16T05:31:00.001-07:00

Reanimation

Damn those Voodoo priestesses

The zombies, they come

Zombiepocalypse Now!

2009-04-16T05:26:00.001-07:00

Solanum Virus

It spreads through just a bite

Run, for God's sake, run!

I am

2009-04-16T05:25:00.001-07:00

New lightsaber, raised

His body lay at my feet

Who's the Jedi, now?

Would you hand me that stake, please?

2009-04-16T05:24:00.001-07:00

I stalk through the night.

Watching. Waiting. Listening.

Vampire Hunter.

Mmmmmmmm

2009-04-16T05:23:00.001-07:00

I shamble, shuffle

In search of my only food

From shadow, a sound

Quickly, I bite at them now

By God, I love eating brains

T-symmetry

2009-04-16T05:22:00.001-07:00

Backwards, forwards: same

Newtonian Time Machine

Physics is weird, dude

MySpace

2009-04-16T05:19:00.001-07:00

Your MySpace page sucks.

Seriously, are you blind?

It made my eyes bleed.

You will however, feel it. Briefly.

2009-04-16T05:17:00.001-07:00

Beware the Ninja:

you will not see it coming,

shuriken to face

They are planning something

2009-04-16T05:13:00.001-07:00

Don't ignore the dolphins

they will rise against us soon.

Avoid the heat rays.

http://anti-dolphin.org/

I repeat, not a drill

2009-04-16T05:12:00.001-07:00

Your attention, please

All persons, evacuate

This is not a drill

5 million robots died that year

2009-04-16T05:10:00.001-07:00

Future memories

Great War of 2020

Time travel rules, man

At first twilight

2009-04-16T05:06:00.003-07:00

A cold, silent night

Sharp metal streaks through the air

The ninjas attack

We serve the emporer with great honor

2009-04-16T05:06:00.001-07:00

Waves crash on the hull

Red pirate blood soaks the deck

Ninjas: victorious

I'll be long dead

2009-04-16T05:05:00.001-07:00

Voyager, a probe

far away, a response, sent:

"You are not alone"

Twihaiku

2009-04-16T03:37:00.001-07:00

Two twitter twats tweet:

twain twilight 'twas twinkling 'twixed,

twhirled 'tween two twee twigs

Plus, it always blinks 12:00

2009-04-16T03:26:00.001-07:00

At the frequency

2.45GHz,

water is heated

Einstien, My Hero

2009-04-16T03:23:00.001-07:00

Any reference frame,

in a Minkowski spacetime,

via time dilation,

observes lightspeed as constant.

Special Relativity.